Strutting & Fretting

A few weeks ago I tapped out a long and very angry blog post. That post, titled "Dear God", was the last desperate death throws of my faith. It was my renunciation of the things that I had believed since 1994. Don't bother looking for the post, it's sat in the system, but I've no intention of making it public.

I said some things that needed to be said out loud - for my own sake. But there's no reason to throw it at you. While many of my posts appear rather angry it's all part of the style of the site, "Dear God" was real anger and it was too ugly to share.

Oh come on, leave her alone. So the Bishop of Southwark goes batshit crazy on booze in public and keeps his job but this lass gets fired for something private.

And while I can understand why the swinging got her in trouble, I'm surprised about the drinking. Banning the clergy for getting drunk is a one way trip to running out of clergy. Mad, the lot of them.

The nomination of Sarah Palin as the GoP VP candidate in the US presidential election has once again brought the subject of creationism to the fore. When the Republicans cynically decided that what McCain needed in a running mate was someone who owned a vagina I'm not sure they knew what they were letting themselves in for because Palin brings with her a whole heap of down-home nonsense. Like creationism.

One of the most common questions you hear from people discussing creationism is "how can someone intelligent believe in it?" And of course hand-wringing liberals make all kinds of excuses for intelligent people who seemingly believe the world was made in six days 6000 years ago.

Governors at St Monica's High School in Prestwich have banned the anti-cervical cancer vaccine being administered to pupils at the school.

They believe that the vaccine promotes promiscuity. Because of course, most teenagers abstain from sex for fear of cancer in thirty years later. The stupidity of this position beggars belief.

Let's be clear, this is not the teaching of the Catholic Church. The church itself does not object to the vaccine against the virus that causes 70 percent of cervical cancers.

No, it is the idiotic set of governors at the school.

So Cartmel Veteran what's your position on all the conflict within the Anglican Church right now? With all the battle lines being drawn as different factions fill sandbags and mount their machineguns you must have a position on this possible schism in the church CV?

A group of people in Suffolk wants to silence church bells. It seems hours of musical ringing has really got their dander up.

I'm not sure they've gone after the right target though. Musical bells played by a group of people are a rather attractive sound that's as English as can be. It's the sound of the nation and interesting hobby for those who wish to make music with friends in such a skilled and physically demanding way.

On the other hand church bells that ring out at various times of day are an anachronism. They had a point when people used to guess the time of day based on how many of their children had died of the black death, but we've got clocks now. And watches. And mobile phones. And cars. And television. And radio.

Last night Channel 4 aired an interesting and rather unintentionally funny documentary called In God's Name about the danger in Britain of fundamentalist Christians gaining influence and power in the UK political system.

On the whole, while entertaining, David Modell's film failed to prove its hypothesis, though he seemed to think it had. The truth is that the three very sad figures of Christian Voice's Stephen Green, the female Christian parliamentary lobbyist and the rather strange lonely bloke John - all cut rather pathetic figures that were far from powerful.

Stephen Green continued to show why his tiny little group of nutters has failed to achieve anything other than annoying people. He's an insignificant racist twit of the highest order. He believes Islam is from "the pit of Satan" and that when a bird shat on him (to the amusement of Modell) that it was a message from God to stop taking part in the filming.

You know, I'm not entirely happy with the way this planet is being run. Sure it can be great sometimes, the beautiful sunny weather this evening is rather splendid, as is the Smirnoff Ice that's going down very well as an appetizer to tonight's pizza-based repast.

But that really doesn't make up for 22,000 killed by a typhoon in Burma. Nor does it make up for what awaits me on Sunday when I will be scattering the ashes of my late wife Lanie.

Gordon Brown is getting an awful lot of stick at the moment for the mess he's making of the whole 10p tax debacle, the credit crunch and the war in Iraq. People are calling for his resignation.

So it seems fair enough to me that we call the management of this planet to account for what's going on. How can a typhoon that kills 22,000 people happen to fall into someone's blind spot? I'm sure many will be praying for aid for the people in Burma, but it makes more sense to me to ask God what exactly he was doing that evening that was so bloody important.

That's the same question I've asked him about the day after the twins were born when Lanie was allowed to die. I'd like to know what was going on in the management of the planet on that day. We've two children that might like to know the reason one day.

Perhaps it is time for a public inquiry or even impeachment for the management. Perhaps it is time for us to remove the diplomatic immunity offered to deities for so-called "acts of God." I'd rather like some answers.

I've watched the debate on the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Bill rather aghast at the unscientific, uncharitable and anti-intellectual guff that has been spouted by various bishops over the last few days.

You would think that science was suggesting we open up the gates of Hell rather than keeping splodges of cells alive for just two weeks to help solve major illnesses and bring relief to millions. There's more life in the potatoes in your cupboard than these embryos. But there are some clerics who think these splodges have more right to life than you mother suffering from alzheimer's, your dad with Parkinsons, your friend with cancer.

Tonight we start marriage prep and I'll admit I'm nervous. Being visited by a married couple of clergy members and my beloved being a member of the clergy means that I'm going to be completely outnumbered by dog-collars.

I know it's not the case that I'm being vetted by the church to see if I'm allowed to marry one of their own - yet it is a slight fear I still have.

Of course with everything Rowan Williams has done recently and with my own experience it should really be me that's vetting the church, but I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt if they reciprocate.

However Bill Door has suggested that there's no reason for me to be outnumbered tonight and has sent me a link to Universal Ministries where I can be ordained for free.

I've filled in the forms and I'm now Reverend Harry. I do expect you to treat this calling with the respect and decorum it deserves. But I'm a humble man and won't be using the new title very much, only perhaps when complaining to food companies and trying to sound pompous and self important.

Not that I do that very often.

Ruth Gledhill, perhaps the best correspondent on faith issues in the popular British press seems to have written the best analysis (open in a new window/tab) of the Rowan Williams debacle.

Well Rowan Williams certainly has stirred up a hornets nest this week with his comments on the adoption of Sharia Law in the UK. Away from the tabloid hysteria it seems his views were pretty moderate, the main failure at first glance - was one of presentation and naivety in addressing this issue in the way he did.

But even when we get away from all the shrill nonsense you've no doubt read in the papers over the last few days there are some deep problems with Williams' view.

He is suggesting that we ultimately will have to abandon one rule of law for all citizens of our nation. I think that's a very dangerous thing. Law is one of the many pillars that holds our society together and if it crumbles, then our society is left much weaker. The church was once also one of these pillars, perhaps shoring up this part of our society would be a fine role for an archbishop rather than trying to deconstruct another.

Once again obsessive "Christian" nutjob Stephen Green and his (very) small band of fundies have been shown the door by the British legal system.

Green's shrill little group - Christian Voice - tried to sue BBC boss Mark Thompson over the decision to screen Jerry Springer The Opera.

Two judges decided Green's case didn't have any merit as the opera "as a whole was not and could not reasonably be regarded as aimed at, or an attack on, Christianity or what Christians held sacred."

Well here's one way of getting folks into church, let them come and play Halo 3.

Across the country, hundreds of ministers and pastors desperate to reach young congregants have drawn concern and criticism through their use of an unusual recruiting tool: the immersive and violent¹ video game Halo.

Those buying it must be 17 years old, given it is rated M for mature audiences. But that has not prevented leaders at churches and youth centers across Protestant denominations, including evangelical churches that have cautioned against violent entertainment, from holding heavily attended Halo nights and stocking their centers with multiple game consoles so dozens of teenagers can flock around big-screen televisions and shoot it out.

This advert has been running on British TV the last few days advertising this autumn's term of the Alpha Course - the church's series of introductory seminars on Christianity¹.

It's a neat commercial and I laughed the first time I watched it. I love the style of the animation and on my first viewing - not knowing what it was actually about - I was surprised and delighted by the reveal. It wasn't just another bank commercial with that annoying Howard bloke about to leap out and start singing at any moment.

RJ showed me something rather interesting this evening which was a catalogue from a company that supplies church furniture and priestly apparel.

I was rather shocked by it.

If you ever wonder why so many churches are in a state of disrepair then you only need look at a catalogue like this from such blatant robbing swine.

Just my luck, Firefox crashed after I'd written some 750 words on the subject of Jesus' healing of Jairus' daughter (which was Sunday's reading in church) and the role of fear in our lives. It was pretty good stuff and I'll no doubt try to remember it all later and post it again - but for the moment I may as well just skip on to the purpose of that discussion.

The general gist was this, sometimes the things we fear are a smaller cause of suffering than the fear itself. Fear can paralyse us. Fear is the opposite of faith, which is belief in the future. Fear attacks us at the centre of our belief - in ourselves, in others and in God.

How is this relevant to a phone call I made this morning? Well because sometimes we have to take big leaps in life and looking over the precipice can fill us with fear. It's not the leap that's scary, it's waiting for your turn to jump.

A few minutes ago I jumped.

Today the Conservative party announced (open in a new window) it was considering a policy to give married couples a £20 tax break.

Of course this has caused consternation across the political spectrum. Despite being a miserly amount of money the general opinion - from what I can gauge from listening to as much of the 5Live phone-in as I could stomach - is that this is an evil idea?

Why?

Well there's no such thing as an absolute good or absolute evil anymore. And daring to suggest that marriage is the most stable and loving environment for raising children is akin to announcing you're a paedophile.

No not aliens in a virtual Manchester Cathedral, this time its the real thing. Beware pigeons of Norfolk, Norwich Cathedral is out to get you (open in a new window).